Monday, May 08, 2006

3 weeks later...

There are a few occasions in my life where I can completely and totally connect with someone. I've gotten to know a lot of women in my life that have come and gone. Some have made an impact in my life; others would be best left forgotten. =)

There are a small number, and you know who you are, that I have had a total connection with and still keep in touch to this day.

With each connection, this sometimes leads to some kind of relationship. It could be the best of friends, or perhaps something more intimate such as a serious relationship, and sometimes it just doesn't work out.

As human nature would have it, there's a tendency to compare your new current relationship to your previous ones. And as a check, there always this idea that you would want something better than you did in the past. You take what you've learned from the past and apply it to the present. With that it mind, it can only get better.

There's always this yearn to experience a feeling that you haven't felt before in the past. Or perhaps you have, and you just don't know how it feels like anymore because it has been so long.

You eventually want to work it up to the "higher level." You want to meet someone that you can completely and utterly connect with. Sometimes you meet someone that, in a matter of seconds have an instant care and admiration for. You can't explain why or how, but it just happens. This person completely "gets" you. They can look at you and read what you are thinking and hear a lot of the words that are left unspoken. They just feel what you are thinking. They finish your sentences. They get your humour. And there is nothing in the back of your mind that makes you worry about what they will think of you. Because its easy. You are not afraid to hold back and be yourself. You get into this natural high with them, and its this excitement that you feel that makes life so much worth living.

Sometimes this understanding, this connection, may take months, even years to establish as you get to know one another. Sometimes people may not even get to experience this at all and the relationship doesn't work out. But magically, others get lucky and this is established with just one day of meeting. For reasons that cannot be explained its like both of you somehow knew each other in a past life and it almost seems like you two were soul mates right from the beginning.

This feeling is a complete endorphin rush. Almost intoxicating. Euphoric.. It's Addicting and you never want it to stop.

But then things get complicated. The reality of life and its uncontrollable circumstances take over. Frustration surfaces. You begin to question why fate is such a tease.

Then you realise..it was simply a taste.

A taste I want to experience again, but not sure when or how or if I'll get a chance again.

Its very rare and hard to find and I appreciated every single moment of it. It's a level of connection that I didn't know could exist so quickly and so easily.. until now.

This was 3 weeks ago... and the buzz still hasn't left me. I need another fix soon... but not sure how long I'll have to wait.. or if it will happen again.

1 comment:

ExPat in London said...

yes I do actually.. but I believe most people don't find them all in their lifetime. =)